Back in the Game

Last night I attended a resource parent appreciation event at CHOR. It was a nice simple affair, to thank the foster families for all they do for the children in their care. It was strange for me to go alone, but thankfully my friend was there as was the former baby-sitter, so I knew two people. Consuelo was there, and was kind to me as always. It was a bit strange meeting the supervisor who had “the talk” with me, but I figured best to get out and let them see I’m not some damaged little weakling, rather than hide in shame. Unfortunately, I could not stay for the entire event because I had a therapy session. But, we had a nice meal and as I was leaving Consuelo gave me the cutest little planter, a certificate of appreciation (I wonder if that seemed incongruous to them?), and beautiful Sorreli earrings. Consuelo also asked about the letter from my therapist. She told me they have been getting a lot of referrals and she would really like to see them place a child with me.

Last week Monday, I was out having dinner with a friend, and my cell phone rang. I have CHOR programmed into my phone and when I saw the name, my heart did a flip-flop, since I hadn’t heard from them in a long time. It was Consuelo and she wanted to know what was going on, if I was still planning on being a foster parent, since she had not yet received a letter from my therapist. I let her know I would get on it, that I had mentioned it to my therapist and he said he would write the letter and apparently had not. So, I called the office. I hate calling this office because it is impossible to get to speak to an actual person. Shouldn’t they try not to make anxious, up-tight people less anxious and up-tight? Anyway, the woman I spoke with suggested I leave a message for my therapist (his name is Greg) letting him know it was urgent. I did this and he called me at work last week, asking me to ask my case worker (Consuelo) what she wanted in the letter. He asked me to write a letter and bring it along to my next session, which was last night. He told me last night that he had no idea I was so adamant about being a foster mother. Despite my unfounded fear he would declare me unfit, he actually felt it would be good for me to be a foster parent. He said helping someone else is sometimes a therapeutic recommendation to help people grieving and dealing with difficulties in their lives. So, I have the letter to give to Consuelo which will put me back in the running as a foster parent. I am strangely excited.

I don’t really have much other news. Healing is rather boring, like watching paint dry or grass grow. Speaking of grass, I mowed mine for the first time since I moved into my house 5 ½ years ago. It was one of the only things Flaco would do without me telling him to do it. I guess he liked it. It doesn’t bother me, in fact I found it oddly empowering. It’s just one more thing I have conquered, at this point.