Respite Rage

I am feeling very frustrated with CHOR these days. For whatever reason, I feel like every time I ask for respite lately, it just doesn’t work out. I had requested the kids be in respite Saturday morning through Sunday afternoon to attend my sister’s bridal shower Saturday evening and to spend some alone time with Primero on Sunday. I was told I didn’t give enough notice and so no one was available. With previous case workers, when I gave advanced notice they would forget to find respite and well, you can imagine how having had so many case workers in a short period of time it can be frustrating keeping up with how each one operates. My utter frustration with respite has reached a boiling point at the moment. I don’t feel like I ask for respite all that often, especially considering I am a single parent and that Chica Marie’s behaviors could cause Mother Theresa to need a shot of something strong every now and again. I was especially perturbed to be denied respite for a special occasion like my sister’s bridal shower. I think it is just down right crappy. I did give a heads up with the wedding dates when I will need respite, but I don’t really trust CHOR or our case worker to find a place for the kids over July 4^th weekend, so I will try to find someone on my own. The additional frustration to this past weekend was that I had a back-up plan approved, until 12 noon on Friday when the case worker called me. Initially she was fine with Primero watching the kids, with the prudent parenting rules I’m allowed to choose whomever I trust to watch the kids. Great! I trust Primero, he’s good with the kids, he knows our routine and it would all be fine and dandy. But no. CHOR did not trust him to be with the kids for such a long period of time because he ran away a few months ago. Jerks! Total jerks! Not only were they basically saying they didn’t trust my judgment to leave the kids with Primero, but they also believed Primero would what, run away and leave the kids there alone? Run away with the kids? What in the world?! I was so angry I was shaking. Fortunately, Mr. J and his girlfriend came to our rescue and agreed to stay with Primero and the kids and I was able to go to the bridal shower, but I’ve about had it. I’m done asking for respite. And I am done sharing anything with the CHOR case workers. The home visits are going to be very dull because if I’m not going to be supported why should I have to sit and give every detail of our lives to an uncaring entity? I’ll take care of everything, including finding my own respite when I need a break. So don’t come asking me for a thing.