Sharing with Strangers

“Are you currently a foster child or have you “aged out” of the foster care system?”

 

For reasons I don’t quite understand, the above question is on forms we have participants complete when attending a mandatory event to continue collecting their unemployment compensation benefits. I know, my job is so glamourous. I’ve had people ask me to translate the question and so my simplified version is, “Were you in foster care?” and the majority of the answers are “No” and we can move on the other perplexing questions. Yesterday, this was not the case. I was working with a gentleman and he answered affirmative to this question. So, since he was an adult over the age of 24 and thus ineligible for the young adult program concerned with this question, I tried to move on. But, he asked what it meant to “age out” and so I explained if he has been in foster care and turned 18 with no permanent home. “Oh,” he said. “Well, I was in foster care but I got adopted out.” Not long after this revelation he shared with me that he is in stage 5 renal failure and will most likely need dialysis soon. I’ve been thinking about him ever since, wondering about his story and wondering if this would be my oldest son in another decade or so (not having renal failure, but seemingly lost in the world telling a stranger he was in foster care and adopted). I wondered if he knew his biological family and, if he would need a kidney transplant, would there be anyone able to contact to see if they were a match? I hope he will be able to regain his health and never need to explore that option.