Causing Pain

Last night Primero and I told Chica Marie that her mom was staying with her grandmother and older sister. She took it about as I expected she would. She cried quietly at first. Then, when it was bedtime, she got more agitated and started talking more about it. At first she said she was mad I didn't tell her sooner so (in my words) this hurt could already be over. I explained that I wasn't sure it was something I should be telling her at first and I also didn't want to be the one to hurt her with this information. She then demanded why I cared, why did it matter if her mom lived with Grandma, like who cares? How would I feel if I had to move back in with my mom? She then wanted to know why her mom couldn't just live on her own, in her own place. I explained that her mother was staying in a housing program but she did a good job getting healthy and so she was able to move out and needed a place to stay. Of course this didn't placate Chica Marie. She avoided saying her mom lived with her sister. But, she kept talking about it for a long time. She asked me why I told her, why didn't I just let it be a surprise for the next time they went to visit Grandma. I asked if she would really want to be surprised like that and at first she said yes, but then when I pointed out how upset she was, she said no. She ended the conversation by saying, "Next time we go to Grandma's I'm just staying," I didn't answer her because I know she didn't mean it, she was just upset and hurt. I don't know if I did the right thing telling her, I thought about it so long. But, when I talked to Primero about it and he told me how much he would resent me if he found out and then found out I knew well before he did and never told him. I don't really know if Chica Marie would feel the same way. I'm just glad she is talking to me about how it makes her feel right now.