PDA

PDA. I was searching for ways to help my Love Bug when he struggles at daycare and at home. I found PDA. Last week if you had said PDA to me, I would have thought Public Displays of Affection. This is not the meaning I think of now. PDA is Pathological Demand Avoidance. Just the name resonates with me when I consider Love Bug’s behaviors. But, when I read more and when I completed the questionnaire, it was like unlocking a huge door in understanding my little guy. Essentially, at their core, the meltdowns Love Bug has are really panic attacks related to the number of demands that have been placed on him. He short-circuits, hits an overload and just goes buck wild. I found it oddly confirming to read some of the strategies listed because I have already implemented some of them to illicit cooperation from Love Bug. I’m not perfect, by any means, but the injection of humor or distractions is definitely something I’ve been using, mostly successfully, to keep Love Bug from an explosive issue. What drew me into this finding was reading about children who seem to “pass” verbally and socially when it comes to ASD, but in reality they are not doing so well. When it listed charming as one of the ways kids with PDA cope with demands, I knew in my heart-of-hearts this was what plagues my Love Bug. I text the mobile therapist and asked if he has ever heard of this. I know the mobile therapist is feeling pretty frustrated with my little guy these days. But, if he can see that Love Bug is not reacting to misbehave, but he is having a version of a panic attack, maybe he can help us to better manage the stress Love Bug is feeling. This potential diagnosis also helps explain why all the structure that the Early Intervention group touted as the golden ticket, didn’t sit well with me as the answer to helping Love Bug. He likes structure to know what is going to happen, but he mostly likes not having demands placed on him. The bottom line for autistic kids with the PDA sub-type is they need to be in control.

 

I don’t know if anyone will take my discovery seriously. I’m not a mental health professional, after all. I am, however, a Love Bug expert and if I was already using some of the strategies listed, implanting more of the same could be beneficial, I would think. Still, I don’t expect anyone to take my word for it. I will be talking to the neuropsychologist when we have our first visit in July. I want him to find the right diagnosis to help Love Bug, so I want to give him things to ponder, to see if those things fit. I fully recognize I could be wrong. But, I started crying when I tried to read the case studies of the young children who were diagnosed because it was like every piece of the puzzle was just clicking right into place. So, I want to work on adapting some of the other listed strategies and when I see things working, I want to help explain to the daycare staff, the school staff and the mobile therapist what works so they all can help Love Bug get along.