Vehicle Freedom

Last month we went on two long-distance trips without Primero. Columbus Day weekend we took a trip to visit Esperanza in Buffalo. I have been missing her and while she keeps saying she will come down for a visit, it doesn’t happen. So, I found a relatively cheap AirBnB so we drive the six hours to visit her. Primero was supposed to go along with us, but he “forgot” to ask off and then couldn’t find anyone to replace him. So, I braved the trip by myself with much miss-giving. The kids did really good on our trip to Virginia Beach in August and the distance was about the same.

We had a beautiful, crisp autumn morning when we set out. At first, Love Bug did really good, thinking we would soon be there. After a short time, however, he lost his patience. We were not quite half-way into our journey, but I promised to stop and get something to eat. Love Bug napped a bit after we ate but was impatient and screaming when he woke up. The drive was gorgeous due to the leaves being in peak color in northern Pennsylvania and New York.

The ironic thing was, I had gotten a new phone the night before our trip because my old phone would not charge in the van. I discovered the morning we were leaving that my new phone was not compatible with any of the charging cords, so I couldn’t charge it either. Thankfully, the battery was on 9% by the time we reached our destination.

I had never stayed in an AirBnB before. We actually staying in a bedroom in the apartment of two men. We had our own bathroom, but the rest of the space was shared. It was a little awkward. Thankfully, the men were understanding with my children. They were not the least bit awkward, chatting and exploring and just being themselves. For me, it felt like more work trying to keep my kids in check the entire time. Luckily, it wasn’t a very long visit, just two nights.

Since Buffalo is close to Niagra, we decided to spend a day exploring the park and seeing the falls. Primero and I had visited the falls the last time we were in Buffalo to pick up Esperanza but we did not spend much time there. So, there was a special ticket which allowed us to visit the aquarium, museum, ride the Maid of the Mist and see the movie about the falls. If I had been by myself I would have spent a lot more time at each location, but Love Bug does not have that kind of patience. He almost didn’t go on the boat because he was afraid. It was such an awesome experience. You can really feel the power of the water on the boat as the mist pelts your face. It would have been a little more enjoyable if it has been a little warmer, but it was still so cool. We got pretty close to both falls and got pretty wet despite our bright pink ponchos. Mostly, we just had a great time being with Esperanza.

It was a little strange to go from being in her sparsely furnished apartment and back to the more elegant apartment where we were staying. We were definitely swinging between two different economic classes. Esperanza’s boyfriend didn’t want to buy much furniture until they find a more permanent place. So, we had the choice to stand or sit on the floor. The floor they explained had been covered in trash just a few months prior when they first moved in. Our visit ended abruptly when Esperanza’s boyfriend and his brother started smoking pot. Esperanza got very angry at them and said she was going to throw the brother, his girlfriend and their baby out because she felt it was disrespectful. She begged us to come back in the morning to say good-bye before we headed home. She didn’t want us to leave on a bad note.

I’m proud of Esperanza for making her way the best she knows how. I know things could have been easier for her if she had been willing to accept more help, but I also know she needs to go things her own way. I’m not sure how great the relationship is with her boyfriend, but I didn’t say anything. She is working an taking care of herself, which is good. She might come visit us for the holidays. I promised to pick her up in Philly, if she can get the bus or train there. I’m so glad we finally have a vehicle that can get us places when we want to go.

A few weeks after our visit to Buffalo we headed south to visit my sister. The trip wasn’t nearly as long, but more stressful because traffic anywhere near DC is a nightmare. We had a nice visit with my sister including a visit to the Air and Space museum near Dulles airport that has a full-size real (like it has been in space! More than once!) space shuttle. They were celebrating Halloween so it was much busier than usual but there was also more fun things for the kids, like candy and robots. My brother-in-law had gotten pumpkins for the kids to decorate and then we watched the Toy Story 4 movie. We left the next morning after breakfast and building Love Bug’s Lego space shuttle. It was a little stressful Sunday morning because the kids were too full of energy and not listening. It makes it hard for me to enjoy myself because I feel like I’m just running interference to make sure the kids don’t do something that sours our trip or worse, our relationship with our hosts. Hopefully, we will be able to visit my sister a little more often, now that we don’t have the added expense of a rental car.