Baby Fever

I have a confession. I don’t know how or why it has happened, but I have some serious baby fever. I think it all started a few weeks ago when Esperanza and I were rearranging and purging some of the baby clothes I’ve collected since becoming a foster parent. Among the 4T and 5T items I was searching for to clothe Chica Marie, I found Love Bug’s baby clothes and some baby girl items that were gifted to me before I knew about Love Bug. I was oohing and ahh-ing over the baby girl clothes, exclaiming how cute they were and refusing to give them up for donation. Esperanza, in exasperation at my hoarding tendencies (but, in my defense, almost all of my foster kids came with NO clothes and so having these items helped me out in a pinch!), said, “You need a baby girl!” A few weeks after that we were shopping for clothing for Primero’s girlfriend’s baby for Christmas. I found a darling outfit and offered it as a suggestion to Primero. And, then I just could not stop. Esperanza and I were like kids in a candy store gushing over outfit after adorable baby girl outfit. And the baby fever crescendoed from a small barely-lit ember to a raging inferno. It’s surely just a phase, one I’m hoping will pass soon, but for the moment I keep thinking of tiny baby Love Bug and his itty bitty fingers and toes. Then, I force myself to remember the sleepless nights, the long colicky crying spells in feeble attempts to dampen the flames. I remember talking to a friend who had baby fever when her little girl was around Love Bug’s age and so I wonder if it has something to do with your baby suddenly (well, it felt sudden to me!) morphing into a toddler that sparks the flame? I don’t know, but for the time being I enjoy squealing in delight over baby clothing and reminiscing about tiny appendages.