Hola from the Pit of Despair. . . . I keep telling myself, "I am fine. I am fine. I am fine. I am fine. IamfineIamfineIamfineIamfineIamfine." This doesn't help much. I feel like my cramps mock me. I can't keep my mind on task. It just keeps bouncing around, finding the tinest thing to remind me there is no baby this month. I hurt as I begin to heal, yet again. I've been here before.
Tomorrow we have our second appointment with the infertility doctor. I am dreading this. I don't enjoy seeing doctors in the first place and now I am submitting my most intimate parts to intense examination and study. I am mostly terrified that the doctor will find something so wrong, so irreversibly wrong, that there will be no fix. Or (worse yet) that the fix will be too far out of financial reach for us (no Rockefeller in our families). I am trying not to think about it, but my cramps keep me in-tuned to my predicament.
It's funny how simple words of understanding from complete strangers can make me feel a little bit better. My blog was submitted to LFCA and some very kind bloggers expressed their words of sympathy with me. I truly appreciate it - I know you "get" it and your support brought the hint of a smile to my otherwise sad face. Thank you.
I'm glad you can feel some comfort from the comments you receive! I know it's been a huge help for me.
ReplyDeleteTry not to panic too much about your doctor visit. If he diagnoses something, try to think of it as something you can work on rather than something that's wrong or irreparable. Even with many of the worst problems, there are some fixes. Granted, it doesn't work for everyone, but oftentimes the most complicated issues only need very small, easy fixes.
Crossing my fingers for you and sending good wishes!
Here's hoping there is some easy fix for you....or that you come into some sort of unexpected inheritance. Good luck either way...fingers crossed that your next appointment goes well.
ReplyDeleteI came over via LFCA...Fingers crossed for you guys!
ReplyDeleteI found you through LFCA. I'm also a new blogger (http://theprincessandthepeestick.blogspot.com), but I'm a veteran infertility patient, I'm afraid. Here's hoping that you stay a rookie. Fingers crossed for you that your RE gives you good news.
ReplyDelete