Dog vs. Human

I wrote about how we have been taking care of a foster dog named Mocha. Coming from a foster background, I was struck by the differences and similarities of fostering pets versus children.

 

1. Just like children come into a new home and need time to adjust, so did Mocha. He came into the house like a hurricane and while he is still full of boundless energy, each day he seems to settle just a bit more. Sadly, he did not seem to have a honeymoon period, although I suppose that’s simply because as a dog expectations are lost on him.
2. More often than not a child first coming into care has very little with him, generally just the clothing he was wearing and whatever he could grab without a moment’s notice. I’ve had children come to me without a winter jacket in November. Mocha, on the other hand, came with everything that was his – toys, food, treats, and kennel. His owner wanted him to feel at home as much as possible. Nothing came in a trash bag.
3. When you get a call regarding a placement things can happen very quickly. I remember being at work one day and getting a call about two young girls. After they called back asking if I would take the newborn sister they told me the county was on their way to my place. I literally had to drop everything and race home to accept the placement. I agreed to take Mocha late Monday afternoon and he was deposited at our place just after dinner that same day.
4. For a foster care placement, the county reaches out to CHOR when they are unable to place the child(ren) within their own foster homes. CHOR takes the information and tries to determine what foster home is a) open, b) able to handle whatever needs the child or sibling group might have, and c) potentially willing to take the placement. They call, give what little information they have and then leave the ultimate decision to the county. Many times a simple phone call does not materialize into an actual placement. Conversely, for the doggie foster care, they post a dog in need of a foster home on a private Facebook page. The open foster home responds and the intake form is emailed. We are often times asked to go to the home and pick up the animal ourselves, which is not something done in foster care. Yes, I have picked children up, but that was at CHOR not their home. I did not pick up Mocha, another volunteer was extremely helpful in bringing him to me, but I was initially asked to do it.
5. We don’t have a case worker for Mocha, but there are two volunteers who have been checking in on him. They don’t come to the house, but they text me frequently to see how we all are doing and to get a better idea of Mocha’s personality.
6. Mocha has already been matched to a potential adoptive home. He will visit them on June 3^rd and if all goes well he could move in that day or the next day. That means Mocha will only have spent 3 weeks in foster care before finding a permanent home. In contrast, Love Bug will be 3 the end of June and his adoption is still pending, TPR just happened the end of March.

 

 

For some of the differences, there are obvious reasons. Mocha’s owner willingly released him due to financial struggles. For the most part, children are not willingly placed into foster care, they are removed for their safety. Once Mocha’s owner decided to relinquish him, there was no going back, no case plan to follow and umpteen chances to do the bare minimum to get Mocha back. Another major difference is the agency discouraged visits because they would confuse Mocha. I had actually offered to keep in touch with the owner, to let her know how things were going or allow for visits. One of the volunteers I worked with suggested that I send pictures for updates (the owner has not taken me up on my offer) rather than in-person visits so Mocha could get settled and not be confused.

 

In speaking with Chica Marie about Mocha, it seemed to help her understand her own situation a little more. She had asked if we were keeping Mocha and I explained he was only staying a short time as a foster dog and he would move when he found a new forever home. She got a little upset and said she didn’t want Mocha to leave. I explained that we could love Mocha while he was with us, but he needed a bigger home with space to run around and play, like my parents lab on the farm. She agreed but said she would be sad and miss him. I acknowledged we would be sad and we would miss Mocha, but we would also be happy for him, knowing he found a new loving family. Then, Chica Marie asked about our dog Prancer. “Is she leaving?” she asked, worriedly. I explained that we adopted Prancer so she is part of our family now and we are her forever home. I could tell Chica Marie was mulling this all over and examining it against her own situation. I think it sort of helped her to see things a little differently when she projected herself onto the dogs.