Stay

I’ve been seeing a lot of chatter on Facebook and other blogs about a “word of the year” – one specific word that is supposed to guide you in the year to come. Apparently, there is a book about it, which I have not read but think I might (you know, in all my free time). I thought it sounded like a good idea but didn’t think I would be getting in on this latest craze because there’s no way I could pick just one word. There are a lot of words I like and I tend to be long-winded and wordy in general, so finding just one perfect word, nope ain’t gonna happen. Then I was reading a blog by a new foster parent and she talked about the book “To the end of June” written by a former foster child and featuring information from other adults who had been in the foster care system as children. The blogger mentioned a specific quote about staying, that families don’t leave one another they stay. And it hit me. It hit me like a ton of bricks and then some. Stay. My word for 2016 is stay. I need to stay the course not only with my nutrition and exercise, but also with my epiphany regarding infertility and my jumbled path to motherhood and the positive feelings I’ve recently come to regarding all of that (it made my therapist cry when I read it to her, so I think it’s a pretty good thing). But, the first thought that popped into my head is Chica Marie.

 

Now, let me tell you why it was so powerful to have that happen today. For Christmas, Hermano got an I-pod (I didn’t even know they existed anymore!) and he asked Primero to put songs on it for him because Primero has about a million songs. Well, last night Love Bug found it and carried it into the kitchen to me while I was washing dishes. I asked Chica Marie to put it on the counter in front of the TV where Love Bug couldn’t reach it. This morning Chica Marie asked where it was (odd) and declared she had no idea where it was or what happened to it. I was irritate but we didn’t have time to tear the house apart to look for it, so we went about our day. At daycare I was dropping Love Bug off when Chica Marie’s teacher came to me and said, “Miss A, we don’t allow electronics here” and handed me the I-pod. If I was a cartoon character my face would have turned red and steam would have boiled out of my orifices to the sound of a train whistle – I was pissed. Not only did she steal something and take it to daycare but she LIED about it. I talked to her and let her know the trouble she was in and asked for her to be given a time out. The daycare worker said they weren’t allowed to give kids a time out (um, what? No wonder they have so much trouble with Chica Marie!) but she could have her play quietly by herself (because that’s punishment). I said not to worry, I’d be sure to issue that time out when we got home this afternoon and stormed off to work. 

 

So, to have they word stay crash into my brain like a freight train after being so angry with that little girl this morning, is saying something I think. Chica Marie might give me nothing but trouble for the rest of her natural days. We might butt heads like rams dueling for the last ewe on earth, but I need to stay. I need to stay. And Chica Marie needs to stay. Because no matter what, at the end of the day that’s what will be most remembered and most honored. I stayed. She stayed. And we all stayed together.