Thanksgiving Visit

I ended up leaving work earlier than my given dismissal time on Wednesday because I feared the snow would begin obscuring the roads. As it turned out, if I had waited until my release time of 2:30, the roads would have been more clear. Oh well, I had to make a judgment call on the information I had. Regardless, Primero and I made the trek to pick up Hermano and then turned right around and came home. We picked up the little ones, visited the grave of the boy’s uncle and headed home. Hermano has his panties in a wad trying to see his “bestie” who is now his girlfriend – a pregnant 16 year old. We did end up picking her up on Friday for a brief visit. But, Wednesday night we went home and had dinner. It was a long day for me, so I was anxious to get home and unwind. Wednesday night I slept for nearly 2 hours before the baby woke me up. Hermano was still awake, so he chatted with me as I fed the baby and put him back to bed. We then stayed up and talked most of the night.

 

So, needless to say, I was pretty exhausted Thursday. We watched the parade for a bit and had a leisure breakfast. Then we got dressed for Thanksgiving dinner at my aunts. It was chaotic, as it always is but it was nice. My cousin held the baby so I could eat in peace (this next to never happens as he usually fusses to be held at dinner time). After spending several hours with my family, we left to go to the boy’s uncles place in town. Their oldest brother met us at our place and we then went to the apartment building where their uncle lives. A few other family members were there, like their older sister, and another uncle. After we were there for a little while another man and his wife showed up  - their aunt’s brother. Primero later revealed to me that this man was the man his mother suspected was his father, rather than the man whose name is on his birth certificate. Wow. We stayed until the little girl passed out and I was dead on my feet.

 

Friday we went to pick out our Christmas tree (with the new girlfriend, I might add – why can’t these boys find a nice girl?). Primero chaperoned the love birds visit while I moved my winter shoes from the basement into my upstairs closet. I was upset that there was no interest in setting up our Christmas tree. Hermano was solely interested in this chica and I found it revolting quite frankly. He was rubbing her tummy like he’s the daddy, kissing her belly and they even managed to take pictures and put them on Facebook. I told Hermano that I didn’t appreciate them glorifying teen pregnancy and I was less-than pleased with the whole push to see the girlfriend. I felt like this was his whole focus for the visit and I know Primero expressed the same sentiments. We eventually had a conversation about it, but the whole thing still bothers me. I guess my moral standards are too high? Or something like that, I’m not sure. I just don’t think this young man has any business being with a girl about to pop out someone else’s kid. It’s not like he hasn’t got enough of his own issues to deal with.

 

Late Friday afternoon we dropped off the girlfriend then went to buy a new tire for my car because I didn’t want to make the trip on the old tire that was about to disintegrate. I wished I had had the new tire before Wednesday. We had dinner and then headed on the long drive to take Hermano home, this time with two little kids in tow. When we got to the foster home no one was there. Hermano tried calling all the numbers he had but no one answered, it went straight to voicemail. We sat outside in the car for over an hour before I called CHOR on-call for permission to head home with Hermano. We got Primero’s case worker, which was good because she knew what was going on. She called CYS to let the county make the call on whether to take him back home with us or not. As the phone calls were happening, the adult daughter of the foster parents showed up. She scared us by tapping on the window of the car then walking away. We didn’t feel comfortable leaving Hermano alone with her because the other foster agency doesn’t even know she lives there. So, a few more phone calls with the on-call case worker and then the foster dad showed up. I walked Hermano to the door, intending on speaking to the foster father but he was in the bathroom and wouldn’t come out to talk to me. So, I left and reported this to the case worker. At this point we had been waiting for over 2 hours. It was a very long night.

 

The drama with Hermano continued over the weekend. He text me Sunday morning threatening to run away from his foster home. He claimed no one spoke to him from the time he got home Friday night until Sunday morning when the foster dad banged on his bedroom door to wake him up for church. He refused to go. He got angry and took a walk, then called me. We talked for a bit and then he called the on-call case worker for CYS to tell them what happened. They promised to have his case worker call him on Monday to talk about potentially being moved. I just hope these visits are not being blamed for his malaise in his current foster home. Hopefully they can find a more suitable home for him, perhaps a little closer to town so he feels more connected. We shall see.