Living Arrangements

 I think I mentioned before that Chica Marie and Love Bug’s mom is living with their grandmother and older sister, Mini Momma. It is great to see their mom doing so well, she has really come a long way from when her and I first met. I know she has done a lot of work to get where she is and I applaud her for it because I’m sure it wasn’t easy. But, I am holding my breath and worrying about a potential invite for the kids to sleep-over. It’s not that I don’t want them to spend time with their mom, I have no problem with that, in fact I’m happy she’s in a place where that can happen. What I fear is when Chica Marie realizes and understands her mom lives with her sister. It will crush her wholly, heart, spirit and soul to know Mini Momma is with their mom and she is not. In their past life in foster care, it was noted many, many times by the case workers that their mom would favor Mini Momma over Chica Marie, literally pushing her aside to practice yoga with Mini Momma alone during the visit. I don’t think Love Bug will really understand, but I know Chica Marie will and I know it will hurt her unbelievably. So, when the invitation comes, I need to decide how I am going to graciously decline the offer without making it seem like I don’t want the kids around their mom. Or do I just let it happen and try to help Chica Maire pick up the pieces afterwards? That seems too cruel to me, given the dynamic from before. I don’t know how long their mom will be living with their grandmother, perhaps it is only a temporary situation. I know they mentioned something to Chica Marie at the cheerleading event we attended, but I don’t think she really understood what that implied. But, seeing in person where her mom is staying and how close she has become to Mini Momma (if Facebook pictures can be believed), well that’s a horse of a different color. I guess, at the end of the day, it is better to protect Chica Marie’s feelings than worrying about making her grandmother or mother feel some type of way….