Clout

Like a typical teenager, Primero does not always see the ways that I help him. He has previously expressed how his biological family would be there for him if he were ever in a physical altercation and I think he doesn’t necessarily think of the ways I am there for him. But, I recently had an opportunity to help him out, twice. Last month I went to a training at the county services building intended for new employees of the human services programs. I had attended many moons ago when I was a new employee and our acting supervisor decided it might a good time for a refresher. I figured I would be out of the office for two half-days and that was good enough for me. It turns out, this training helped me in two significant ways in my personal life. One of those ways was making a connection with a Juvenile Probation Officer. After his presentation I asked him if they ever allow students to shadow in his office and he said I should email him to set it up. Before I sent the email, I text Primero to see if he would be interested. I didn’t want to waste my time if Primero was not going to follow through. He text back a very excited affirmative and after I emailed my contact I put them in touch with one another. A few weeks ago Primero spent the day in the office and he learned so much and was very much excited about continuing his education to have a similar career. I was so happy to be able to help him make that connection. The second way I was able to help him was with an issue at work. Generally, I stay out of his work life, other than what he tells me or some general advise. But, he asked me to get involved because he was upset about how a supervisor yelled at him and treated him poorly. I was cautious about addressing the issue, but decided I would send an email from my work email address, which is more professional and official than my private email. I blind carbon copied Primero so he could see what I said.  

“Good afternoon Supervisor - We have never met, but I have heard a lot of good things about you. My son, Primero, has been working in the escape rooms and game room since December. I’ve been so proud of him for getting this job and excelling the way he has. I know he is learning valuable job skills working for your organization. Ordinarily, I offer him advise and a listening ear, choosing to not engage in his employment concerns. However, when he brought home his latest concern, I felt I needed to get involved. Apparently, he had an altercation with a manager during his shift yesterday and I am concerned with how strongly he was addressed. Now, I know my son is sometimes a boundary-pusher. He explained he was being written up because he was not in his work station as was expected. He accepted full responsibility for being away from his assigned station and was not arguing against getting written up, he knows it is justified. The concern comes from how he was addressed, in a very non-professional manner. I am sure it can be hard keeping track of so many different work stations and employees, however my son was screamed at and humiliated after accepting responsibility for his actions. This, to me, is highly uncalled for. I suspect an employee of contemporary age to the manager would not have been degraded as my son was, for the minor offence he committed. I sincerely hope this matter will be addressed and become a small blip in an otherwise untarnished work record. I know Primero enjoys his job and I also know he is a social butterfly who needs to learn how to keep work and his social life at arm’s length. I am proud of him for being able to stand up for himself, but I wanted you to be aware of my concerns as a parent. I invite any discussion you feel would be necessary going forward. My personal cell phone number is 000-000-0000. Thank you for your time.”

It turned into a very positive experience for Primero. The big boss recognized the reaming-out was uncalled for and talked to Primero about it. He also addressed it with the supervisor who admitted he needed to keep his anger in check. He apologized to Primero and everyone was able to continue working together positively. Primero was tickled pink that the clout of my work email address (it’s a .gov email) seemed to drive the big boss into action. I’m not sure if my status as a grunt worker for the Department of Labor and Industry was really the driving factor or simply because I was a mom reaching out about my kid, but in the end, it worked out for Primero. And, now I think he can see I have more to offer than making sure he does his chores and pushing him to stay in school.

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