Ambiguity

I didn't go into work today. I called in sick because I do have a cold and I didn't really sleep last night. And I really wanted to spend the day with the baby. The day has been a slow one. Flaco got a hair cut in the morning (it took a freaking 3 hours!) and then ran out and got sandwiches for lunch (as I made lunch for the baby). Chantel had been expected to visit us at 1. I called her around 1:30 because she had not shown up. She said she had left a message for me at work and one for Flaco as well, she decided she would not need to come out today, since Conseulo was here for over an hour last night. I was disappointed because I thought we would "end" this all today. I guess not.

My mom called me three times today. She was at work and I know she is so torn up about what is happening. The last time she called from work she asked if the social workers would let her and my dad adopt the baby. They care for him that much! Oh, it breaks my heart!

When I spoke with Chontel this afternoon, I asked if/when they would be taking the baby from us. She said it was really up to the county. And the county wants to meet with Flaco on Monday (2/13). She didn't really say what for, but I am guessing to see if there is any way Flaco will change her mind. I told her I was willing to sign the papers today, if I could, so we could keep the baby. So, I guess Monday is when the final decision will be made. I want the baby to stay. My parents want the baby to stay. CHOR wants the baby to stay. The county wants the baby to stay. The baby wants to stay (cute side note, the baby calls both me and Flaco mommy!). It seems the whole world wants the baby to be in our home - except Flaco.

Last night I dreamt all night about the baby. Just silly things like him finally eating vegetables (tried green beans tonight, no go) and fruit. I dreamt about him talking my ear off (speaking of - he learned the word ear today) and going to school.

So, we are hanging out in ambiguity land. I honestly don't think Flaco will change his mind - he is very stubborn. I know I have been praying he will change his mind and so have my close friends, pastor, and family (and my mom asked for prayers on Facebook last night). Really, only God can change his mind. Let's all pray that Flaco will open his heart to this sweet little boy....