Elevator Rides and Court

Court is exhausting! Parking in the garage, lugging two kids out of the car, strapping the baby in the stroller, riding down the elevator, crossing the street, going through the metal detector, riding the elevator up to CYS and then waiting to be summoned to the court room. Then there’s the waiting. The incessant waiting while trying to keep small fussy children calm and not messy or running wild. Babies and children don’t wait patiently and they don’t care who’s in charge or that you’re supposed to be quiet in court rooms.

 

Love Bug was especially grumpy yesterday morning. He woke up around 5 am and just would not settle back to sleep. I had him in bed with me, laying on top of me and that didn’t pacify him. I tried to give him his sippy cup of milk but he tossed it after only a few gulps. For an hour we tossed and turned. My alarm went off and he continued to grex and only settled about 5 minutes before my last snooze button. So, I started off the day tired. Love Bug slept in my bed until I woke him up around 7:30. He sat with Primero for a few minutes so I could finish Chica Marie’s hair and then change him. He cried in protest and didn’t settle until we were driving in the car. I have my grandparents car at the moment because my van won’t start. I don’t even want to talk about it. We dropped Primero off at school and went right to court. Getting into the building wasn’t a problem, but getting an elevator was. Now, I have two small children and a stroller, do you think people would let me get onto an elevator without trying to trample us? No, no they did not. I had to fight my way onto the elevator grumbling that clearly there was no way I could use the stairs. Luckily, the waiting room for CYS was not too busy. Mini Momma was there with her foster mom. Not long after we arrived another CHOR family came in and we waited together. Love Bug needed his diaper changed and when I came back out of the bathroom with him we were ushered back into the play room by the county worker. I was told I wouldn’t be able to stay in the room after the other CHOR children were brought back, but I ended up staying until we were called down to the court room.

 

As a side note, Monday night was the Christmas pageant for Primero’s after school program. It was raining and there was no parking, so I was irritated when we got there, but luckily his friends parents held seats for us and so we settled in to watch the show. Not long after we arrived Primero’s girlfriend showed up. There were no empty seats except for one next to me, so I told Chica Marie to go tell the girlfriend we had an empty seat. There were a lot of groups performing from drumming, to dancing both by little kids and big kids. There were a few short acting skits and a tap routine too. At one point, there were two seats in front of us open. A man came and sat in one of them and lo and behold it was the attorney for the little ones mom. We had seen him when we were out eating a few weeks ago and now he showed up at the CFA Christmas pageant, what a small world! He has a daughter or granddaughter probably close in age to Primero who was dancing tap and he stayed through the rest of the performance. Of course Love Bug was wiggly and not content to sit still for long, so we were up and down and he was passed back and forth between me, Esperanza and Primero’s friend. It made for a long night. I’m not sure if the attorney noticed us, as I tried to keep us under his radar. Chica Marie was in a mood, not wanting to listen to me and insisting on bothering any big kid who would give her the time of day (I’ll discuss this issue in more detail in a bit). I was glad to get home and put her to bed after a quick bath. Unfortunately, after Love Bug fell asleep and I took a shower I had left-over dishes to wash since we got home later than expected Sunday night. Sigh.

 

So, back to the story of court. We trooped down to the second waiting room, just outside the court room as the case before us was finishing up. Love Bug was perturbed at being taken away from the room with toys and interested in only trying to escape from the less-interesting waiting room. When I scooped him up to take him into the court room he howled his dismay and glared at the magistrate as Chica Marie bounced from one foot to the next to her sister, since she is never still. After identifying the children, the magistrate dismissed them back upstairs to the play room and once again Love Bug was not happy with this change as I handed him over to the staff member in charge of marching the three kids back upstairs. I took my place next to the CHOR case worker and the proceedings began. Surprisingly, the kids mom didn’t show up. This is the first time she didn’t show to court. I guess no one was surprised since she hadn’t been in contact with the county case worker and according to the case worker, she hadn’t been in touch with her own lawyer. Still, I honestly thought she would be there. She’s never missed court before, in my experience. The court session was brief. The county case worker mentioned the grandmother presenting for Mini Momma and that the grandmother has complied with all requirements, so the only thing left is a meeting for full disclosure and visits can begin to transition her. Oddly, the public defender for Chica Marie’s father was there. He had requested to be dismissed from the court proceedings altogether a few sessions ago because her father had not participated and had no desire to participate. How sad!  It was agreed that the current goal of reunification was no longer appropriate and so the secondary goal of adoption would now be pursued. Magistrates don’t have the legal authority to officially change goals, but it would go into the record that reunification would no longer be considered. The next court hearing was scheduled for May and the CHOR case worker said she was hopeful the little ones would be adopted by then. Ha! Being slightly cynical regarding adoption timelines, I flat out told her I had no hope that this would be the case. I said it would be lovely, but I truly didn’t believe it would happen. I said maybe next year this time – if we’re lucky! After that we went back upstairs to collect the kiddos and I headed off to ride the elevator with the CHOR case worker.

 

The elevator was as slow as it had been coming up earlier, but we eventually jammed into one and began the descent. Chica Marie entertained the crowd by declaring, “I’m squished and these shoes are killing me!” As we descended, the door opening at nearly every floor, most of the occupants slowly trickled out giving us some more breathing room. The CHOR case worker got off on the second floor mentioning she was going to get a dog license as we parted ways. We finally reached the first floor and it was just the three of us, two men and a woman. The woman stepped out first then one of the men and the other man held the door for me as I wiggled the stroller into position. Chica Marie darted out in front of me and all of a sudden the elevator lurched up, the doors half closed, pulling us about two feet off the floor. As the doors slammed closed I yelled to a blonde woman, “Watch her!” and was left panicking in the elevator with Love Bug and the man who held the door. He frantically pushed the first floor button as the elevator lurched up again then dropped. The doors sprung open and the security guard was there, holding them open as I dashed out to claim Chica Marie from the random stranger I entrusted to watch her. I was shaking. Not so much from the elevator as from nearly being locked away from Chica Marie and not knowing if she was safe. The kindly stranger seemed trustworthy enough, but who knows? Would that woman have stayed with my girl if I had gotten trapped in the elevator? Would the security guard remember who that child came in with and not let her walk off with some stranger? Oh the possibilities make my head spin and my stomach ache! I was so glad the episode was brief and that everything turned out ok. And I must now make sure that Chica Marie holds my hand to leave an elevator!